amalgamation of thoughts

Alhamdulillah,I just got back from jaulah muharikah in a superb but exhausting state.running across the country from johor,melaka,johor again and back to selangor was a uber cool! but i feel homesick already, i haven't seen my parents and siblings yet, i want home. still,i reminisce the moment i was feeling he soothingness of tangkak waterfall,subhanaAllah.its been ages since i get to jump and swim around in public,i thought i was too big for all these excitement,i guess i was wrong!

scrubbing  and scraping the dirt and germs off the panes in the toilet made me realise something.black and white really have a different,and to think all this while , in front of our eyes,sins we do indeliberately or without noticing it, actually dirt our heart out!but how often do we clean this dear thing,how often do we reformat or scrape the bad things or easy said the 'jahilliyyah' out of the heart? i always complain that i'm insufficient of knowlegde to spread the words of islam due to lack of 'filling up',but to one extent,i realise that i'm always with excuses,the predicament is within me,not with the knowledge gained.sometimes, it doesn't mean we need to go to a faraway land to gain experience,but just by climbing the hill of ktt gives you tarbiyyah that you don't often get! and the moment we grab Allah's hidayah or we get that particular tarbiyyah,we need to spread the words of Islam straight away,that's why in our phase of life,we g...

a pot full of laughters and love.will they feel it too?

i'm about to finish my exams and i can't wait to complete the whole of A-Levels(taking a deep breath),i don't know why,but everything is falling apart,and to think everything is going to be even more complex than complex number next semester,due to a grudge,taking care of people's heart and an incident,i now can't ask questions publicly,i don't belong to anyone,so don't chain me,and make my life a misery. i'm so sorry,but this is killing me inside

i still need some time to think about last night's incident i can't keep on bluffing myself but i am sad and devastated,but don't worry,i've forgiven you anyway,it's just that i need some space to think about it. don't worry,i'm recovering and its true that i need to express what i really feel

instead of lullabies and songs is it possible to be replaced with zikr instead of fairy tales and aesop's fable is it possible to be replaced with asbabun nuzul juz amma instead of fancy dresses and shades is it possible to be replaced with shawls and abayas instead of mummy and daddy is it possible to be replaced with ummi and abah instead of a well-known profesionalist is it possible to be replaced by a full-time a da'ie is there a chance for the rise of another umar al khattab salahuddin al ayyubi tariq ziad sultan muhammad al fateh tiflun minal saudi tiflun minal omman bara'a wa samaa minal jordan the brief time with you guys in masjidil haram made me ponder a few things,tiflun yang hebat dibentuk dari ummi yang hebat! sesungguhnya bukan mudah untuk mendidik seorang imam shafi'e mahupun imam ghazali,sebagaimana offspring genotype follows its parents genotype,begitulah pembentukan anak yang faham addeen lahir dari seorang ummi yang faham addeen. ini bukan...

dear ifah, 23rd november is your D-day right?i was once in your place,all freakish to enter the hall with nothing but yourself and Allah,i was once in you place scribbling here and there on the papers given by the lembaga peperiksaan,i was once in your place,feeling blunt and out of ideas,and sometimes gushing with ideas too,i was once in your place,screaming your heart out because you misunderstood a question or forgot to put a fullstop in a sentence,i was also once in your place,seeking blessings from teachers,parents and calling them nearly everyday to tell what happened,i was once in you place,where for once i felt totally gloomy to apart with friends and to actually leave school life! and now i end up here. your a big girl now,big as can be,blooming as ever,i'm lucky to have you as a sister and no matter what happened between us,i love you so much ifah!(OMG i feel a prick in the eyes),i know we always have different taste and we always disagree but on top of it,its always p...

my sister ifah is about to take her spm in less than a week and i am about to sit for my finals in less than a day!we'll certainly be busy these few days and months. exams huh! i used to be among those who would be scared to death when exam is like just in front of you and i would sacrfice my precious sleep to finish the unfinished,although i never end up finished after all.but now its different,after knowing You better, everything has slightly changed and distorted. its not that i'm no more scared or i feel cosy enough to sit back and relax,thats void!but,you feel relieved when you know that Allah is your 'wakil' or easily said Allah is your Guardian.Just study,put some effort and leave the rest to Allah. Ya Rabb, forgive us,the weak, enlighten us with your maghfirah and rahmah, calm us and lead us to your road, to you we believe and put our trust, because from you we came and to you we are returning to may we die as the syuhada'

hari ini usrah adik -adik lagi,dan seperti biasa,perasaan ini akan dibuai-buai oleh perasaan indah.SubhanaAllah,sungguh saya takut.takut sekiranya saya membuat usrah adik-adik kerana perasaan seronok bukan berpaksikan asbab ingin menyampaikan shahadah Allah. astaghfirullah,izinkan saya beristighfar sebelum memulakan penceritaan saya. perjalan mendaki bukit bermula sebaik sahaja semua menunaikan solat asar,kami berkumpul di laluan tengah antara tangga 7 dan library,setelah semua ahli ada,baru kami bergerak menaiki bukit,termengah-mengah dibuatnya,tapi saya sajalah kot,adik-adik sudah jauh kehadapan,tinggal kakak je di belakang,chaperone la katakan.anyway,we walked and paused several times because farah was having a headache and the sun was like right on top of us.we felt liked baked prawns because everyone was  red and sweating.as we were walking halfway,adie's slipper got torn apart so she couldnt use it,and had to walk barefoot.pity her.all of us wanted to offer one of ours bu...

how on earth do you say 'No' to a question asked to you by someone,without hurting that someone.I'm sorry so much,I just can't act honest sometimes.I'm not strong you know!

this post is for you shakira! take care of yusof and yourself too! i'll try to be there for you but you know sebaik-baik penjaga is Allah,so seek Him and he'l know what to do! trust me,love you!

Alhamdulillah! Lunch was superb and delicious!blended with laughters and love,i was happy all along and the feeling of get together was expressed deeply, we had spagetti bolognese mixed fruit cocktail kek batik fried mee hoon lemang lemang and lots of lemang with rendang pulut popia papa kown and mama  ilan orange juice and to top it all up,it rained! hujan rahmat petang-petang raya katanya... when I was small i always chanted with my friends its raining,its pouring the old man is snoring he went to bed,and bumped his head and never got up in the morning and it was the good old days, coming back to reality,i don't really bother when it rains to be frank,what i know is that,when it rains,its best to snuggle back in bed and have a nap! a real long nap. until,nad went to my house and was jumping back and forth,hopping happily and admiring the rain so much.she quickly opened the sliding door and looked beyond our verandah. she was as quiet as mice and loo...

selamat hari raya aidil adha diucapkan dari warga kolej teknologi timur,sepang! this is the 200th post! Allahuakbar!

ketika langit sudah semakin cerah,saya mengambil angin di kawasan belakang rumah,di situ ada sekeping papan lapis yang rebah ke rumput.saya mula berfikir untuk cuba sujud dengan mencecahkan dahi ke papan itu dan menghadap ke arah seluruh umat uslam solat.ketika itu hati saya mula bersuara, "oh tuhan.berilah aku petunjuk" dan ketika saya mengangkat kepala saya mula merasakan sesuatu yang berubah di dalam diri ini.Inilah masanya untuk berubah. -yusuf estes SubhanaAllah!Allah bagi kita hidayah dalam berbagai-bagai rupa dan bentuk.semuanya bergantung kepada keinginan dan kesungguhan seseorang.Kemudian serahkan segalanya kepada Allah sesungguhnya Dialah sebaik-baik pemberi hidayah dan sebaik-baik penjaga. InsyaAllah.

it was nice doing business with you. anyway, thanks for the share J.Lennon.

di saat 2.5 juta jemaah haji,wukuf di padang Arafah nun jauh di mekah al mukaramah,di mana fokusnya adalah Allah dan hanya Allah azzawajalla. aku di sini,di malaysia,bergelut dengan ujian-ujian dunia yang datang bertubi-tubi. how I wish I was one of them,one of the thousands doing pilgrimage,only having to think of Allah and Rasul,only having to mention their names,only having to perform solah and seek blessings from Him. Instead of having to be stuck in college surrounded by a lot of bad things,the goods and bads are mixed up and tangled up,having to think of passing exams,pleasing people,making money. how badly do i want to run a way for a while,find my own space and ber'uzlah'! Ya Allah Ya Rabb,you are the only one who patiently listens to me and comforts me,AllahuAkbar. Ya Allah,sesungguhnya hanya Kau yang ku cintai. Bantulah aku keluar dari kemelut duniawi. kepada para jemaah haji, semoga kalian mendapat haji mabrur insyaAllah. LabbaikaALlah hummala bba...

Sebagaimana indahnya cinta itu,seperti itulah indahnya usrah,perasaan sayang dan rindu akan adik-adik usrah semakin menebal walaupun sudah bertentang mata,ketahuilah adik-adikku,ainin,iqa,adie,fiqah,fatin dan lily,kakak-kakakmu mencintai kalian kerana Allah. Benar sekali kata kak ain,"korang akan sayang adik-adik korang nanti kalau buat usrah,buatlah usrah tu?” kata-kata yang terngiang-ngiang  di fikiran saya sewaktu mula-mula berusrah dengan adik-adik suatu ketika dahulu. Namun begitu,usrah yang saya kendalikan bukan berseorangan,saya ada seorang lagi teman perjuangan,yang saya sangat sanjungi dan sayangi,ukhti athina,bermula dengan rasa sedikit kekok pada mulanya kerana,kami bukan sekelas mahupun satu bilik,kami berpegang pada satu aqidah yang menatukan satu ukhwah,yang membuka mata saya untuk menyayangi ukhti athina. Bukan untuk memberi pujian melambung kepadanya mahupun menitipkan perasaan riak,namun athina,without you,I don’t know how to let adik-adik feel what we f...

if only i was called like that~

i'm being nosy again,but could someone tell me,how on earth can your heart change it's feelings as fast as an a.c circuit does.which alternates less than zero point two nano second,which is way too fast,or am i judging wrongly and from a different perspective. someone once said,you were the only hope for a better future in that place,a place full of unbalanced judgements,a secular place which puts religion and life as two different things.don't try to seek for the soul for Allah's sake,here's an idea,why don't you be the soul for a start? islam itu syumul! ad-deen is the way of life,thus i hope you do some rechecking on yourself,hey go check yourself and if you think you're good enough,do some rechecking! i'm not trying to be a good girl nor am i a trying to be perfect,i was just frustrated with you and i guess that someone would also shake the head with dismay. this is a mere shout out.

whenever everyone's home,abah will start rocking the kitchen.he prepared us an amazing lunch for us all,again!Even una's friends who came all over from terengganu was amazed with abah and the food he cooked.it was very finger licking ans scrumptious,there were fried prawns,'3 rasa' fish,soup ,roast chicken,salad and bandung to top up with.we ate till our tummy could barely say 'stop' because there was too much to eat!i'm proud of my abah because he is the world's best chef,woohoo! itulah sebabnya saya suka balik,makan di rumah penuh dengan barakah dan kasih sayang!di ktt,hari-hari makan di malay cafe or mamak cafe or even mak cik is not very appetizing,but then when we have very limited choices then you have to just simply bare with it.If we talk about cleanliness pun,di rumah jauh lebih hygenic compared to cafe's or stalls!again i'm not complaining but frankly speaking,those who sell food to people have to act like they are in these customers ...

 Umat yang pertama kali dihisab adalah umat Nabi Muhammad SAW, dan amalan yang pertama kali dihisab adalah solat . Sedangkan hukum yang pertama kali diputuskan adalah perkara pertumpahan darah.   ayuh,sebagai peringatan untuk saya,and for the umpteenth time,peringatan untuk saya dan sahabat sahabiah yang lain,tunaikanlah solat dan jangan dahulukan perkara dunia melainkan solat dalam azan pun menekankan betapa pentingnya solat, di mana seruan menyuruh kita menunaikan solat mendahului carta sebelum seruan menyuruh kita mengecapi kejayaan. Allahu Akbar Allahu Akbar. (2X) Asyhadu alla illahaillallah. (2X) Asyhadu anna Muhammadar rasulullah. (2X) Haiyyaalas solah (2X) Haiyyaalal falah. (2X) Allahu Akbar Allahu Akbar. La ilahaillallah.   Maksudnya:   Allah Maha Besar, Allah Maha Besar. Aku menyaksikan bahawa Tiada Tuhan melainkan Allah. Aku menyaksikan bahawa Muhammad itu pesuruh Allah. Marilah Sembahyang. Marilah kepada kejayaan. Allah Maha Besar, ...

It's quite long,but then,with our current status quo,we are just too close till the Day of Judgement,so we need to prepare ourself as much as we can,by reading this,we may get to evaluate ourself.and I got this from raihan' s blog so jzkk ukhti for the soul feeding article! let's go! Gambaran Hari Qiamat ✐ Selepas Malaikat Israfil meniup sangkakala (bentuknya seperti tanduk besar) yang memekakkan telinga, seluruh makhluk mati kecuali Izrail & beberapa malaikat yang lain. Selepas itu, Izrail pun mencabut nyawa malaikat yang tinggal dan akhirnya nyawanya sendiri.  ✐ Selepas semua makhluk mati, Tuhan pun berfirman mafhumnya "Kepunyaan siapakah kerajaan hari ini?" Tiada siapa yang menjawab. Lalu Dia sendiri menjawab dengan keagunganNya "Kepunyaan Allah Yang Maha Esa lagi Maha Perkasa." Ini menunjukkan kebesaran & keagunganNya sebagai Tuhan yg Maha Kuasa lagi Maha Kekal Hidup, tidak mati.  ✐ Selepas 40 tahun, Malaikat Israfil a.s. dihidupkan, set...

i'm at home with my used-to-be-grumpy-but-now-easy-going abah,my outgoing-active-sometimes-nagging ummi,my poetic-freak-of-Shakespeare ifah,my well-mannered maryam,my lovable,adorable brother ahmad and my sweet-smiling una are at home,hence,everything fits perfectly well. their warmth radiates deep down inside me and i'm just glad i was raised up in this family.i'm always grumbling,ungrateful, but i forget that besides the grumbles and ungratefulness,there are thousand more splendid things that happen to me as being part of Nordin's family its just a matter of being happy with what you have! after a rough morning on the train and stopping by at midvalley,all the way from sepang to the furthest of shah alam,it was a long morning yet i safely reached home. moving on, i met up with ayah ming and his family at home,they were staying in a hotel in sunway and like abah quoted,'ayah ming,tak pernah miss holiday',it was true,its like precision in physics where al...

berjihad to be a mujahid or a mujahadah.what is jihad?have you ever wondered what on earth it actually is? well,simply put in words,jihad is the urge to fight against things that make you drifted away to lala land,like having too much entertainment,talking too much about others that isn't your business,sleeping too much until you get a headache.it isn't as easy as written or said but it has to be done. why? well,time isn't something that you can ask for,its not like if you do a mistake,the time can be rewinded.but then,that's why Allah the most Gracious bersifat maghfirah,pengampun,he gives us second chances to redo the mistakes we did. but then again,just because Allah gives us second chances,doesn't mean that we have the right to keep on doing the mistakes?No,of course not!that is why we play our role to be aware of our own actions,and keep questioning to ourselves, "if i wear this,will i look tempting?" "if i say this,does it give benefit to othe...

last weekend,i spent less than an hour at miat for an 'Aero Carnival'.we went their with mr zaini and he was so adorable,i felt like i was attending a primary school field trip, with nad jumping here and there and simply following mr zaini wherever he went.albeit, we learned to shape tiny flowers using clay,got a free 2GB pendrive and got to see loads and loads of planes,the exhibition was just a plain okay. i should say next year,if you wanted to invite people to go to an exhibition like that again,please make it more merrier. but still,i wish i could fly all over the globe and be as brave as tariq bin ziyad to spread the words of Islam everywhere!

something happened last night and i just wanted to quit,i wanted to give up all my adik2!i texted athina that i wanted to back off,she kind off told me off a little,but later that night,surprisingly she came to see me. i asked her,what did she come for? calmly she answered that my message sounded fishy and she sensed something wrong. i was touched deeply. we discussed and tried to fing the best solution,but then again the best solution maker is from Allah alhamdulillah,jumpa juga adik-adik hari ini sesungguhnya sejak memilih jalan tarbiyyah saya mengenal erti ukhwah dan adik beradik satu aqidah athina dan akhawat lain,jazakillah!!! kita sayang awak kerana allah! dan betul kata kakak naqibah saya,kak arifah yang lebih kurang beginilah bunyinya,'korang akan rasa kemanisan tarbiyyah , dalam sepanjang perjalanan kerja-kerja dakwah korang',she also added that we should never try to pause or stop for a while from dakwah,sebab Rasulullah s.a.w yang kita sayangi tidak per...