I just realised,I sometimes, I don't write from my heart,I write what I know,and that is what bugs me,
I thought I poured out what I felt,instead I spilled out what I knew,so when it reached the time,I didn't know,I couldn't dig a thing out.
I need to start feeling again.
And I felt some part of it since the jaulah to Tanta.
I met Islam again,I met akhawat,I met her which gave a big impression to my whole emotion that day.
How I hope that I really convinced my heart, that I am for Allah.I serve my Lord and I am willing to do anything for Him.Anything,inshaAllah.
Down here, I wanted to scribble that I am wanting to enter an RI yet I fear emotions will out rule tarbiyyah.I know tarbiyyah should outweigh the other,but as a human being that is not flawless, I can't help myself can I?
That is why,before i feel complete attached to them,i should keep my heads down and start figuring some things out,Oh Lord,May you ease our way.
Our road to Jannah.