After being on hiatus several months,adapting with Egypt itself,the surroundings,new environement,new people and basically getting to know with the people around me,wasn't like eating nasi ayam back at home.I had to face,phases of tearful nights,depression,lonliness, which was a norm for the first few months,and sometimes it still is if I drift in my lala land,but alhamdulillah thum alhamdulillah thum alhamdulillah,my spirits were lifted because I officially joined usrah with akhawats the same age as me,and were also first years.Subhanallah,Allah's plan are beyond the plans of human themselves.i am so deeply in love with my own circle of love,Afifah,Zakiyya,Diyanah,Atiqah.
When we sit together,duduk beriman sejenak and share the words from our Creator,a different feeling arise,its like being immense in the poor world by remembering Allah gaining spirits.It gave me strength to start everything from scratch yet the same old anxiety and nervousness came back.But in the name of Allah the Most Gracious i begin my seek.
The mad'u hunting.
Will the adik-adik reject me? How will I create tsiqoh with them? What to cook,forgodsake?! And questions after questions keep playing in my head.
But with tawakkal to allah and a little pushing factor inside,Alhamdulillah, i went for it.No one said being in jalan dakwah is easy as strolling in the park to get the beautiful sunset view.I faced hardships and ran out of ideas whenever in front of them,but slowly,pacing the footsteps,it taught me a lot.
Not everyone knows the sweetness of Ad-Deen,and to those out there who feels it,lets work hand in hand to spread the same feeling to others.And like I always mention,because I really want it,to meet everyone I know and brothers and sisters of Islam,in the garden of Delights,one fine day.
Now stepping on reality,we have a very big exam coming just around the corner,so I feel lost for these past two days,I mean hesitating here and there,wanting to pause from dakwah work to focus on study.But alas,how can I be so selfish,how can I think of my own self when the society nowadays are very severe.As a da'ie,I shoudln't have that fikrah.Instead of running away,I have to blend in the dunya,not pause.I must say,that its not easy,but I can do my dakwah despite anything coming in the way regarding dunya,with the condition that I'm able to manage time,I dont procastinate and above all,I must always return back to Him.
Plead from Him,
Seek from Him,
Depend on Him.
Those who believe and whose hearts are set at rest by the remembrance of Allah ; now surely by Allah's remembrance are the hearts set at rest
So,did I mention my adik-adik are so innocent.Ah yes,I guess I've said it several times,but they truly are! They love to cook,and I think they feed me much better than I should feed them,they always skype with their parents,the love their families so much,they dont have boyfriends and have never had any,they talk,giggle,study,complaint about sleeping in class sometimes,solat jemaah and they even eat in dulangs.Comel kan?
They are those adik-adik that when they are given understandings and explanations of the purpose of life,tuning their mindsets here and there,and in no minutes time,they would be like flowers blooming in Spring.
And I,would always pray that they become the flowers of the Deen,InshaAllah.