| ana kamaan!

I'm here,standing,running,sitting,smiling,aywa,I'm here.

But where's my soul,it's here too.

Is it here?

I smile,I just don't feel the pleasure of smiling anymore.
I laugh,I just don't feel the satisfaction of laughing out loud.
I feel,enough to feel what is need to feel.

I think I'm going through a phase which is unidentified,growing up but the harder way,growing up with no auxin to make me grow vertically fast.
It's just that,I sometimes can't remember the old me.

But everything that happens around me is tarbiyyah.

Being here is a tarbiyyah.

And coming to think of it now,I can't stop the tears coming out whenever the Gaza issue comes up.Yes,I know we need to save our muslims there before this.I knew that,but I couldn't feel it,the sense of belonging with each other.

Now,I feel it,and I want to do loads of stuff,being a volunteer in the medical team to go there is one amongst the updated list of future plannings that I have.

I want to be a muslim doctor,for His sake.

Allahuakbar