In the name of Allah the most gracious the most merciful.
For the past few days,being at home was a blessing.Not hectic enough just peaceful to inhale and exhale air,to carry on living with the pleasure of iman and islam.To be grateful enough to actually see my ummi and abah's glowing faces,to listen and joke around with ifah and maryam who are more opened up about their personal thoughts and to play along with ahmad's mischief.
But its not everyday you get to be in this pleasure.
Within this month,too much have happened to me and how I wish I could pour it all out here.but alas,I can't.I don't know how too.
I know I worry a lot,I worry about what's happening tomorrow,how I am able to cope with tomorrow,will I be strong enough to handle tomorrow.being far from my cliques,muharikah in particular is a very challenging decision.
will I still be breathing and talking for the sake of Allah?
will I still be laughing and smiling and chanting gratefulness for Allah's creation?
will I still be able to recite the love letters from the AlMighty?
will I still be alive or still as can be ready to be prayed by others?
How will I know which one will happen?
When tomorrow comes.
I'm crying and crying until my head aches and I feel like knocking my head to the wall.Allah's with you,what are you so sad about!
Saidina Ali one said :
I never worry about what's in it for me tomorrow whether I'll be happy or sad,because I don't know which one is better for me.
I want to smile,I want to laugh,I want to make others smile when spreading the words of Islam,InsyaAllah.