| pondering back

Alhamdulillah,I am currently at home,and the happiness is different.Way different than before,it's nearly the end of Alevels for me InshaAllah,a new beginning for Ifah and her foundation,Una is struggling on her SPM,Maryam is trying to make peace with UPSR and Ahmad is being his own sweet Ahmad.And my ummi and abah,alhamdulillah as great as ever.

Now,after the incident,the mara-stop-sending-students-to-India incident,I really didn't now where to go.To be on the brighter side,I wasn't worried nor was I busying myself filling up forms of applications to any country,all I could say was,'just finish this bloody exam and I'm over it'.The choices were either Republic Czech,Indonesia and RCMP-India.

I didn't take too long to reject the Czech application and Indonesia application,due to certain reasons and I ended up having no choice but he one and only RCMP-India.So that was settled.

But sooner or later,the issue came back,this time my mum had some other thing in her mind,Egypt.SubhanaAllah,I never pictured myself at all to be in the midst of the pyramid country,but my mum told me whether I was interested or not,and surprisingly,my heart did some jolts and i was kind of happy hearing about it.Now on top of all these,albeit what people said,I did continuous istikharah.because its true,who is the best planner than the One who planned it,Allah.

Thinking of it now,we never know what will happen to us in just a split second.One minute you were laughing your way to India,the next thing you know,you're crying all your way back to Malaysia.

It kept me thinking ever since about the whole matter,holistically.How tarbiyyah changed our lives and behaviours,how tarbiyyah gathered us to become muharikah's and get on going with dakwah all for the sake of Allah and the next thing you know,Allah deviated us just to see whether we are in this game sincerely and purely because of Him or because 

other things.Isn't Allah so sweet?

He just wanted us to live merely because of Him and only Him,AllahuAkbar.

So another thing popped into my mind,medicine.Albeit all these happening around me,once in a while,my hearts whispers to me take something else.Not medicine.And to be honest I've been trying to reconsider this whole thing.Should I pursue medicine? should I be a doctor? and what I got was questions.In the first place,did I take it to please Allah?Am I studying because of Allah?

dush dish dush

Why am I questioning and hesitating what I did in the first place?After all,I knew usrah through the pathway to take up medicine,so what is there to regret.The journey might be tough,the journey might be a rocky journey,but that doesn't matter,never fear,Allah's here!

Besides,according to Prof Muhaya in one of her books,she mentioned that according to prophet Muhammad (pbuh) there are five things that are very much encouraged to be performed.One of them is relieving the suffering of others.

And believe it or not,as a da'ie doctor,we not only relieve physical pain,we are also ensuring that the inner side of our body,emotionally and spiritually are also taken care of.MashaAllah,what more can this be taken care of but a doctor.A holistic approach thats what we want.

Thus all in all,be it Republic Czech,Indonesia,India,local or even Egypt,any where can do.It is not a big deal.Lets together bear in mind,the reason we are anywhere is for the sake of Allah,so no matter where he puts us to,that is the best for us,InsyaAllah

Then there are among men such as say, "We believe in Allah.; but when they suffer affliction in (the cause of) Allah, they treat men's oppression as if it were the Wrath of Allah. And if help comes (to thee) from thy Lord, they are sure to say, "We have (always) been with you!" Does not Allah know best all that is in the hearts of all creation?

al ankabut:10

Wallahua'alam