amalgamation of thoughts

Venue : Petra, Jordan Sebagaimana gambar ini statik dan tetap di posisinya, seperti itulah kita, andai ruh tidak menghidupkan kita.Jika ditenung lagi,sekalipun kuda yang terukir di syiling itu 'kaku', tapi ia terus kelihatan 'meluncur'. Selagi kita terdaya, jadilah kuda yang bergerak seiringan dengan tarbiyyah dan dakwah.

Its after midnight, so I'll use the term last night to refer the hours before midnight struck. Last night, was a quiet night. No meetings. No usrahs. No gather ups. Nothing. And I remained silent doing nothing. Until the night ended. I realized it was such a waste of time because I wanted to fill it with many things, getting prepared for usrah with mutarabbi, preparing for my own usrah with murabbi, making sure that the lay out of work until Opick's night is smooth and I wanted to study. But I didn't do anything. Partly, because I was bothered. The other half was because I was pondering how little time I have for myself right now and yet I still cannot manage my life as a daie. Right, did I mention I was bothered? Indeed I was. For some times now, I feel empty. But don't misunderstand, this is not futur. My usrah is going on as usual. Meetings are done once a while. Usrah with mutarabbi are done frequently. Easy said, inshaAllah sentiasa mengisi diri. 

Its March, yes, months pass by, without fail, with His will. And here I am steady as can be, beginning a new semester and being piled up by work loads that are pushing me to an extent that is beyond my comfort zone. now i get it, all this while, i have been tucked in safe and sound in my very own cocoon. you won't suffer the blade until you yourself have been cut by it . That is when, to one level, you want to run away and hide from people around you, run away to be embraced by your loved ones. do everything because of Him. either you begin to do something with force, or willingly, remember to renew your intentions, scared that every deeds didn't even count in front of Him, simply because you did it because you thought that you were able to do it, instead of because He gave you the ability to do it. but it ain't that easy, thus, tawakkal kepada Allah wahai daie sekalian,  letakkan seluruh pengharapan pada Dia. kerna tawakkal seorang