amalgamation of thoughts

Hi, I am contract medical officer, with no guarantee of a permanent post. Hence hashtag hartaldoktorkontrak comes in. On this day, I was at home due to home quarantine,  i am not sure if i wasn't quarantined, would I be among those marching out from wokrplace? In my area as I work in a health clinic in district area, those in contract post are minorities,  so I know i'll be working,  BUT, I know I support my colleagues doing the strike because we do have the rights,  we have been fighting behind the curtains for so long,  and once this opportunity is given, we go for it, I am certain I am not someone with a very aggressive who speaks out loud eventhough its to say the truth,  i am quite of a hesitant, i am quite of indecisive person, I am not a spirit fighter,  I am not saying that I am not scared of the future,  but I know when I have the rights, I will fight for that,  and I know to put on a proper fight, we need to be prepared, with a gaun...

 Salam to all,  Lets start of with a quote,  “Your best friend is the one who: seeing him reminds you of Allah, speaking to him increases your knowledge, and his actions remind you of the hereafter.” (Al-Muhasibi) I have some inner and outer crisis going on now. Have you ever felt you loved someone and yet you are showing it badly and the loved ones are going in the opposite direction ?  Thats exactly how I feel now. I feel terrible today. I realise that I have weird ways to show how I love and care for people, and sometimes I just give all the wrong signs,because my words say something my heart disagree. I am dishonest with myself. The thing is, I have this circle of girls that I love and have cherished since our housemanship era. They have been with me through thick and thin, and they are RAW. I have not mixed with much people since college, my surrounding has always been those yang saling menasihati or saling membaiki, and somehow sometimes i just feel its too goo...

A little throwback to cov-eid 2021. I am so blessed to be able celebrate the fiesta with them, to pray solat sunat raya, to hear abah's khutbah, to eat ketupat, lemang and rendang, nasi impit kuah kacang with our signature dish nasi dagang ikan tongkol.  We then had our annual photoshoot with ahmad leading the way, hence took so many pictures for keepsakes. Pity this time, hannah was grumpy halfway through the photoshoot. She is going to regret it nanti bila tengok balik gambar.  That sums up our raya and its content enough for our cosy small family,  Nowadays the case are rising and my predictions is it might take months before i get to meet them again. Now how disheartening is that? Stay safe everyone! back from left : una, maryam, me and uun(adik ali) front from left : ahmad, ummi, abah, ifah, hannah and ali From left : una, ummi, ifah, hannah, maryam and me

 Hi and assalamualaikum ,  Where should I start? Well currently my housemate was just detected positive COVID for the second time. And yes she , well us the households are all vaccinated, thank god! So what does this indicate?  It means i am a PUI(person under investigation) thus i need to be quarantined to a certain period of time before i am considered COVID-free despite negative COVID swabs. Now, How do I feel? Scared of course! Scared that I might have one and health-wise post COVID is no joke to the body.With mixed feelings as my quarantine means lesser healthcare workers at clinic and that needs replacement here and there, which is actually a hassle. My swab was taken yesterday(23/7/2021) but the results still aren't out yet. So I am kind of having some palpatation due to this.  However, there is this small lingering relief feeling, as I haven't completely rested since I started my work since Raya. I think my body has been working 7 days a week and it reached t...

She stared at the sky profoundly. It was immensely beautiful how it was painted with blue violet streaks. She hummed to herself ‘what a wonderful world’ enjoying the breeze while she wrapped herself with her arms and enjoying every second. It has been a while since the pandemic that is gruesomely taking lives and bringing the whole country into utmost misery, she could barely empty her mind and she almost felt suffocated. But she wanted to have one moment for herself, to reflect back and to stay composed. It was nearly dusk, she realized now the sky has painted itself amber orange. It was almost time to go back to her safe haven however her mind lingered back to her past memories. What is better than gold? She looked at him and paused, life maybe, while shrugging her shoulders. He let out a spontaneous laugh but held it back with a cough. She let out a frown but tilted her head trying to rack her brain, A pure heart, he said with his slow raspy voice,  Both are hard...